I touched my forehead to his. Nose to nose. Shoulder to shoulder. I felt that I could not get close enough to my husband last night.
I cherished his hand in mine. The tiny grasp with so much strength and stubborn will. My little one needs my hand to guide him today, so I take it.
I saw my boy off to school. In the rain. Under a pink umbrella, because I haven’t bought a new one in eons. I saw his hopeful face off to a world that I know is hurting.
Every day it is a different piece of news. Cancer. Bombings. Threats. Shootings. And yet it is Monday morning and we are in our routine. Alarm clocks. School buses. Writing.
What can I say? What words can I pray?
I find myself returning to the psalms. The authentic cries to God that have been poured out for generations. The words that pierce my soul and understand my heart and at the same time point me up to the place where my hope is found.
Last night as my Redbuds and I cried out to God for one another, I was brought back to Psalm 27.
and Psalm 23:4
I fear no evil, for You are with mePsalm 23:4
And I hear within my soul a groaning:
I call as my heart grows faint;
lead me to the rock that is higher than I.Psalm 61:2
Lead me Lord to you. Lead me to your refuge, to safety when all else is chaos. Lead me to peace when anxiety and fear overtake me. Lead me to your words of life in the midst of death and dying.
Lead me to rest when the assurance of peace feels far gone.
If I were to look only at the world today, I would hide under my covers in despair. But there are Words of Life that “lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”
Prayers that are words of God for me to speak to God with the assurance that He hears our cries for help.
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.
My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.Psalm 28:6-7